


Protected from the Darkness

by Mickey_99



Series: Haikyuu Soulmates AU [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Abuse, Hinata Shouyou is Sunshine, M/M, Minor Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Sad Hinata Shouyou, Soulmates, Triggers, angsty hinata, mentions of kags story, minor self injury, ooc kags, that's the first one in this series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-10
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:46:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24099835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mickey_99/pseuds/Mickey_99
Summary: Hinata is happy. That is his role, the happy one.He's getting really tired of not being able to cry.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Hinata Shouyou/Kozume Kenma, Hinata Shouyou/Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Hinata Shouyou/Kuroo Tetsurou, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Series: Haikyuu Soulmates AU [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1736596
Comments: 38
Kudos: 732





	Protected from the Darkness

**Author's Note:**

> There are parts of this that reference the previos story. but ultimately this can be read alone. You get more context if you read both. Please let me know what you think.

I am supposed to be the happy one. That has always been my role. I was the oldest sibling, and my mother’s only son.

“You protect me from the darkness Shouyou,” my mom would say,” Your smile always seems to light the way for me when I am sad. Whoever your soulmate is, they are incredibly lucky.”

Her statement had made me so genuinely happy. I made it my mission to keep my mom and sister happy.

It was only a couple months after Natsu was born that things took a drastic change in my life.

“I am going to take Shouyou to work with me tomorrow.” My dad states,” Give you a break from watching both the kids. I know its hard with the new baby.”

I heard my mom begin to say how I was actually a huge help to have around but my father cut her off.

“Besides there are a few of my coworkers who are just dying to meet Shouyou,” My dad says,” Plus I would like my new boss to meet my strong little boy.”

He directed those words over to me, where I was sitting on the couch playing with my crayons and coloring sheets.

“I am super strong daddy!” I said,” I help mama with Natsu all the time.”

He smiled at me. And looking back now, there was something in that smile that I should have been wary of. My dad was never really interested in me before that day. He’d taken me to his job a few times when my mom had begged him to, like when she had an appointment or something to do. But whenever he took me with him, he would dump me in the corner and ignore me. I was six though, so it didn’t exactly cross my mind that my father would ever do anything to harm me.

And it wouldn’t cross my mind until the next day when we got to his work.

He turned around in his seat with a terrifying expression on his face. “Hinata, when we get to my boss’ office you are going to do whatever he asks you to, if you don’t, I will hurt your mother so badly that she can’t walk and kill your little sister. Do you understand?”

I was absolutely terrified. “Yes daddy.”

When we got to his boss’ office, I was quickly shoved inside. Money changed hands. My clothes were removed. And I was told to do things like; suck this, bend over this, sit on this.

And every time I tried to refuse; my dad would whisper in my ear.

“I could kill Natsu so easily you know, and I could easily do all this to your mother when I get home.”

And I didn’t want him to hurt them. Because I was meant to protect them. I protected my mother from darkness.

And if anything at all was the embodiment of darkness, it was the pain and shame I was feeling right in that moment.

It went on for years, my dad would find some way to get me out of the house with him. And then he would sell my body to a friend with sick intentions. Sometimes he would get drunk while I was with his friend, and then he would use me himself when we got home.

Nothing was more shameful than trying to hide my grunts of pain into my pillow while my mom slept in the other room.

**_It’s to make her happy!_ **

I would think to myself.

**_To protect her from the darkness._ **

That was my job.

**_To be happy._ **

So, I would force a smile on my face. One that was real only because of the knowledge that I knew my mom and sister were okay. Sometimes, I managed to fool myself into thinking I was happy.

When I discovered volleyball, I threw myself into the sport despite not having a team. Volleyball made me happy. And my job was to be happy.

Never did I think that I would be saved by my little sister. My little sister who had, unknowingly, alerted my mother to what was going on.

It had been a rainy day outside, and my mother was in the kitchen. Me and Natsu were on the couch. I was tickling her, and we were both smiling and laughing together. All of a sudden, she stopped laughing and looked up at me with a serious expression.

“Ni-san,” she said,” Why were you and Oto-san naked in your bed last night.”

I froze. Part of me looking around to see if he had heard, before relaxing and realizing that he was at work. But I was only relaxed for a second, because I heard my mother drop the pan she had been cooking with on the floor.

_She had heard._

“Shouyou,” she said,” What is Natsu talking about?”

I froze, because this wasn’t supposed to happen. If my mother and sister die, then I would have no one. I would have no reason to be happy. I had long since given up on the idea of my soulmate ever wanting me after all that had been done to my body.

I didn’t realize that I had been panicking until I saw my mom sitting on her knees in front of me. She gazed into my eyes gently.

“Shouyou,” she said gently,” Please honey, I won’t be mad. I need you to tell me what’s going on.”

“I can’t,” I said panicked,” He said he would hurt you if I ever told. He said he’d do those things to you and Natsu.”

I didn’t realize I had started crying until she wiped a tear away from my face. I looked into her eyes and saw she was crying too. I knew she already knew without me actually confirming. My panic and tears had been enough.

“Shou, honey, when did this all start?” I heard her ask.

“When I was six, and he took me to meet his new boss. He makes money. I make him money.”

My cheeks burned in shame. And I looked down where her hands were joined with my own.

“I’m sorry mama,” I said quietly,” I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

She had pulled me into a hug, before putting both myself and Natsu into the car and driving to the police station.

Later that night my father was spending the night in jail and the cops had a warrant to search his phone and computer. They found photos of my body, and correspondence with people from all over the country who wanted to try sleeping with an underaged boy like me. There had been a waiting list, and a schedule along with videos that he had been using to market my body.

The evidence was damning but, in the end, he had taken a deal. 10 years with the ability to get out earlier on good behavior. All because he relinquished names of other child traffickers’ names in the area.

My mother tried to get me to go to therapy, but I refused. I didn’t need to. I was the happy one. The one who protected her from the darkness. I didn’t need something that was going to cause her to stress about money.

“I have you and Natsu,” I said to my mom with a big smile on my face,” That’s enough for me!”

“You’re smile makes me so happy Shouyou,” she said to me.

And I felt my smile grow wider.

When I first met Kageyama Tobio, I knew he was just like me.

“What have you been doing for the last three years?”

I wanted to say, ‘Same as you.’ But I held back.

When we met at Karasuno not long after we didn’t get along straight away. His need to push people away annoyed me to no end. And my lack of technical skill irritated him.

But we soon became incredibly close friends. And for the first time I opened up willingly to someone. Granted he opened up first. But I still told him.

And I found that my role, even in his life and on this team, stayed the same. I was the happy one.

Soulmates were a thing that I didn’t really think about much anymore. I was old enough to know that the things done to me when I was younger, were the type of thing I was supposed to do in a loving way with my soulmate. Who would want me in a way like that after everything that had been done to my body in the past?

So, when I ran up to the random boy sitting on the side of the road on his phone, I wasn’t really thinking about fate drawing me to him. But when he turned to look at me with those eyes of his, I froze.

He was gorgeous, exactly my type.

“Wow,” I heard him breathe.

It took me a few minutes to realize that his eyes weren’t on my face, but instead they were trained on my arm. I looked where he was looking, there was writing all over my left arm. Two different types of writing.

I caught a look at two names that stood out on my skin.

**_Kenma._ **

**_Kuroo._ **

“You’re my soulmate?” I asked, I sounded like I was out of breath. And tears of utter happiness were gathering in the corners of my eyes.

“Well,” he said smiling, his smile was small and shy,” One of them at least.”

“Do you know our other one?” I asked before mentally face palming, of course he does. But before either of us could continue the conversation I heard a voice to the side of me down the street a bit.

“Kenma!”

“Oh Kuroo,” he said looking over.

“I told you not to wander off Kenma,” Kuroo says.

I felt like I was going to go insane. My soulmates were both my type.

“My god,” I said out loud, looking between the two of them,” I’ve been blessed. They are both hot as hell.”

I slapped a hand over my mouth. I hadn’t meant to say it out loud, but I did. And I said it louder than I would have liked too. I found my shoes suddenly a lot more interesting than anything else around me as a heavy blush graced my features.

There was a moment of shocked silence before I heard the one named Kuroo speak in a very amused voice.

“Well Kenma,” he said, and I swear on all things holy that his voice portrayed the smirk he had on his lips perfectly,” Are you going to introduce me to your friend?”

“He’s our soulmate,” Kenma said without any hesitation,” Our writing is all over his left arm.”

Without looking up from my very interesting shoes I held my arm up in his direction as proof. I hadn’t been expecting a hand to grab my own and pull me into a very well sculpted chest. I tensed for a moment, but relaxed when I realized the touch was a gentle one. I blushed when I realized how well built the tall man was.

“Well, isn’t he cute?” Kuroo’s voice said.

I didn’t think it was possible for my skin to match my hair, but it did.

“Kuroo we should probably go,” said Kenma,” Write us your phone number, okay? See you later, okay?”

I watched in stunned silence as they both took off.

No one was more stunned than me when we ended up on opposite ends of the court. And when I smiled while playing that game, I felt happier than I have in years. And after the game when Kuroo and Kenma were walking home with me to meet my mom, I found my own place in our relationship.

“That was the happiest I have ever been while playing volleyball,” said Kenma,” I have never really liked sports, but I am going to do my best so that I can play a game with you again.”

Kuroo made a noise of surprise.

“Kenma has never been this enthusiastic about anything shrimpy, no wonder you’re our soulmate.” Kuroo says smiling. He throws an arm around my shoulder while Kenma links his hand with mine. And I found myself sink into my role in our relationship.

**_The happy one._ **

**_I would protect them both from any darkness, by being happy._ **

“I’m home Mom!” I shout from the doorway,” Come meet my soulmates.”

I heard a crash from the kitchen and from upstairs at the same time. And I watched as my little sister all but threw herself down the stairs in wonder. And as my mom practically skipped into the room.

“Oh, my word Shouyou!” she says hugging me. “You could have given me a heads up, so I made a more exciting dinner than ramen!”

She put her hands on her hips, but I knew she was messing around.

“Sorry mom,” I said,” We only found a little bit ago that they would be able to come. They live in Tokyo. Kenma’s mom only responded she could drive here to pick them up a little bit ago.”

“Well tell her to just stay there,” My mom said happily,” They can stay the night. I mean that is if they want to.”

Kenma immediately called his mother to let her know.

“Kuroo shouldn’t you let your parents know where you are?” I asked.

He gave me a pained smile,” My parents kicked me out when they found out my soulmate was a male. And even if I wasn’t, I have a feeling if I told them I had two male soulmates, they would probably kill me.

“Well dear,” My mother said,” You have a family here now.”

I smiled and gave Kuroo the warmest hug I could. And he smiled.

“Man Shrimpy,” he said happily,” I wish I had met you years ago. Your hugs make everything okay.”

I smiled. I was happy.

**_I would protect them from the darkness._ **

It was right around then that I heard Kenma get off the phone with his mom.

“She said it was okay, but that we needed to bring you to Tokyo to meet her as soon as humanly possible,” said Kenma smiling,” She was even trying to get us to stay the entire weekend but I didn’t want to overstay our welcome-“

“Go call her back and tell her you’re staying,” I heard my mom shout from the kitchen,” You guys just met, and you live in Tokyo. You should get more than one night all together.”

I heard Kuroo laugh beside me. And I blushed. Kenma just nodded before deciding to just text his mom the news instead of another call.

“Where is your dad Shou?” Kenma asks, noticing the lack of a male presence in the house.

“Dead,” I said. I left it at that. But I could hear the lack of noise from the kitchen, meaning my mom had stopped to listen. She would probably ask later why I lied to my soulmates.

Kenma and Kuroo seemed to pick up on the fact that I didn’t want to talk anymore on the subject and didn’t ask anymore. I quickly collected myself and slapped a smile onto my face.

“Kenma!” I said happily,” Can you show me that game you were playing earlier?”

That weekend had been so perfect that when it came to an end, I felt myself almost being ripped in two. I knew the two of them would always hold a piece of me with them wherever they went.

After my first, Kenma’s second, and Kuroo’s third year were done; Kuroo ended up getting an apartment with Bokuto, Akaashi, and Kenma. And even though I was only there on weekends and when I had days off of school where I could get out of volleyball, I found that I was there enough to constitute having a good chunk of my clothing and stuff over there with them. And every time I saw them, I would put on my best smile, give my best hugs, and push away the panic and nightmares during the time I was with them.

That is until I got the letter.

****

**_Hinata Hideo, is to have his sentence shortened due to good behavior._ **

He was getting out after only two and a half years due to “good behavior”.

**_GOOD BEHAVIOR._ **

I sent a text to my mother about going to visit Kuroo and Kenma, before grabbing my train pass and the letter and leaving for Tokyo. I felt my hands shaking and my head pounding. I must have been visibly swaying because an old woman stood up and told me to sit down.

I somehow managed to mumble a thank you before sinking into the seat and shoving my face into my hands. I numbly remembered that I needed to let the team know why I wouldn’t be there for the next three days. I thanked whatever God was in heave that school was out for the next three days.

I got my phone out and took a picture of the letter in my hand and sent it to Kageyama.

_Sent 3:46 pm_

_He’s getting out in four days. I am going to Tokyo to be with Tetsuro and Kenma. Please cover for me at practice._

_Received 3:47 pm_

_Oh my god, stay safe Shouyou. I will cover for you, of course. Hajime, Tooru, and I are thinking of you. Stay safe, okay._

_Sent 3:47 pm_

_Thanks, Bakayama._

_Received 3:48 pm_

_Just stay safe, dumbass. Try and talk to them about it. This situation shouldn’t have happened. He shouldn’t be able to walk around free._

I felt tears prick my eyes and I left his message on read. I didn’t know how to explain to him that I couldn’t tell them because I was supposed to be the happy one. The one’s who protected them from darkness.

**_I had to stay happy._ **

Eventually I arrived at my soulmates’ apartment. I raised my hand to knock but instead was almost bowled over by a rather excited owl.

“Sorry I didn’t think anyone would be outside the door,” Bokuto said before looking up at my face. He lit up.

“Hinata!” He shouted, before hugging and running off in the direction he was going before he almost ran me over.

“Bokuto-san,” I heard Akaashi say from inside,” Please use a quieter voice.”

I saw Akaashi appear in the door, he had on what looked like practice clothes.

“Oh hi, Hinata-kun,” he said, he looked surprised to see me,” I didn’t think you would be here. Kuroo said you had to be at practice.”

“Things happened,” I said,” I managed to clear my schedule. I’ll probably have to do extra laps though.”

I laughed the best I could, but it must have sounded strange, because Akaashi gave me a concerned look.

I felt my heart clench, because I was failing to do my job.

“Well Kenma is at practice till later and Kuroo-san has a couple late night classes he has to attend, so neither of them is home. Are okay by yourself till you get here?” Akaashi asks me.

I nod quickly.

“I’ve had to do so before,” I say smiling slightly,” I know where everything is. Plus, I want to surprise them so I will be okay.”

He nods but seems to be hesitating on leaving. But Bokuto seems to pull him away.

“Come on Keiji!”

“I am coming Bokuto-san,” Akaashi says irritated,” Please try to calm down.”

I walk inside before Akaashi shuts the door behind me. I hear him yell something to Bokuto about slowing down. But I have a feeling it fell onto deaf ears.

I somehow managed to drag myself over to the couch after kicking off my shoes before falling onto the couch in a heap. I felt a pressure behind my eyes from crying all day. And I felt the panic I had been feeling since I got the letter threatening to explode out of me.

**_Pick yourself up Shouyou! You are supposed to be the happy one! You have nothing left to offer them if you get rid of that. You can’t even give them your body, because who would want that after all that has happened._ **

I threw my train pass and the letter onto the table in front of the couch. It didn’t cross my mind that it was a bad place to put the two things within my panicked state.

**_Just get dressed for bed and go to sleep, tomorrow you can go back to being happy._ **

**_You are the happy one._ **

**_You protect them from darkness._ **

I threw on one of Kenma’s shirts and threw on one of Tetsuro’s hoodies overtop keeping my shorts on before crawling into the middle of the bed and curling into myself and into the smells of both my boyfriend’s. I felt myself being pulled into a deep sleep.

When I woke again, it was in a fit of pure terror. My breathing was ragged and only got worse when I realized how dark it was in the room. I felt myself shaking as I tried to place where I was into my head. But it wasn’t working. Nothing was going through my head but fear and panic, and I felt myself pitch forward in an act to make myself smaller.

“Shouyou?” I briefly hear a sleepy voice in my panic, but I couldn’t place it in my head. Who?

“Shou?” Another voice, this time more panicked, deeper than the last.

I let out a distressed noise as my lungs screamed out is protest. I recognized I was now in short sleeves only briefly, and that was only because I noticed nails were digging into my arms hard enough to draw blood. This sent me further into my panic as I began to scream. I wasn’t recognizing the nails as my own.

“Shit,” I heard a voice say,” Kenma get the fucking light.”

Suddenly there was light, and the hands were being yanked away from my arms. No more nails. I was pulled back into a strong chest. Two strong arms were crossed over my chest over top of my own arms. I began kicking my feet, still not comprehending where I was. I felt my head grow fuzzy before a weight appeared on top of me.

“Shouyou please, it’s me Kenma” I heard a calm voice say,” You have to breathe, come on, breathe with me.”

It was then that I noticed the soothing circles being made on my shoulders from the person who was behind me. I relaxed slightly into the gentle touch. I clenched the fabric of my shirt and relaxed a bit more when I realized that I was clothed. It was then that I slowly began to mimic the breathing from the person in front of me. And Slowly the sights and smells of the room began to filter through my head.

I was in Tokyo.

Kuroo was behind me.

Kenma was in front of me.

I was safe.

**_SAFE._ **

I fell limply back against Kuroo.

“I’m sorry,” I said crying,” I’m sorry.”

I look down at the bed in shame.

“I shouldn’t have come here. I should have known this was going to happen.”

“What are you apologizing for Shou,” I heard Kuroo ask,” It makes me so happy to have you here. Please just tell us what happened so we can help.”

“I can’t,” I said,” I can’t be sad. I am supposed to be the happy one, so I can be there for you guys. I can’t cry. I am not allowed to be sad. I have to protect you two, Natsu, Tobio, My team, my mom. I protect them all from being sad by being happy.”

**_I have to protect you from the darkness._ **

“Stay with him Kuroo,” says Kenma, before leaving the room,” I feel Kuroo tighten his hold on me momentarily before turning me around to face him.

I feel him rest his forehead against my own.

“Shou,” He says, and I find my eyes locked onto his cat-like golden orbs,” Nothing would make me happier than being able to help you. Same with Kenma, we both just want to feel the satisfaction of helping someone we love.”

I didn’t get to respond before Kenma re-entered, holding a paper in his hand.

**_The Letter._ **

“Is this why you were panicking Shouyou?” Kenma asks gently.

I didn’t answer, I just buried my head into Tetsuro’s shoulder in shame. I felt a broken sob leave my mouth. I felt Kuroo’s hand rub my back.

“Who is this person?” Kenma asks.

“My dad,” I say brokenly. My eyes clench shut.

“Can you tell us what happened?” asked Kenma.

“I don’t want to,” I said, my voice sounded wet and hoarse.

“Okay well if I give you yes or no questions, will you be able to answer honestly?” He asks.

I nod my head, keeping my eyes shut. I didn’t want to see their faces when they found out the truth. The truth about how disgusting I am.

“Were you abused?”

_I nodded._

“Was it physical?”

I remembered all the times I said no, and he slapped me.

_I nodded._

“Did your mom know?”

_I shook my head._

“Was it just you that he hurt?”

_I nodded_

I relaxed a bit. Maybe he wouldn’t ask. Maybe they never had to know the factor that the abuse centered around.

“How old were you when it started?” He said,” I know its not yes or no, just hold up the number with your fingers.”

_I held up 6 fingers._

“It says here he was put away in your last year of middle school,” said Kenma,” Did he keep hurting you for all nine years?”

_I nodded._

And then I froze, because Kenma was hugging me. And he was thanking me for telling them. Telling me how brave I was.

And all I could think was how guilty I felt for letting them believe that was the full truth.

They both got up to leave the room, Kuroo mentioned going to tell Akaashi and Bokuto that everything was alright. And Kenma was going to get me some water to drink.

I don’t know why I spoke up, but as they reached the door, I opened my mouth.

“It wasn’t just physical,” I said, I couldn’t look up at them, but I knew they had stopped moving.” He had an entire market going on my body. He would take pictures and video; he would send it to people in exchange for money. And if they paid enough, he would drive me to a hotel where they could sleep with me. He said if I told, he would hurt my mom like he hurt me. Said, he would kill Natsu. Would beat me if I said no. It never felt good. It always hurt.” My hands were fisting the sheets and my eyes were clamped shut. “All I had to give you guys was my smile, and I can’t even give that to you right now. I’m sorry. I just want to be good enough for you guys.”

I was crying so hard that I didn’t notice Tetsuro walking over to me and grabbing me into a hug down on the bed.

“It’s going to be okay Shou,” He said gently,” I won’t let him hurt you. Kenma won’t either, okay. And I don’t care what they did to you. What they did has no effect on how much I love you. And I am sure if Ken was in the room, he would say the same.”

“Where is Kenma?” I ask, part of me panicked thinking he left because he thought I was pathetic.

“He went to let Akaashi and Bokuto you were okay now, to make you some tea, and get a compress for your head. I am betting you have quite the headache now.”

I nodded. “Thank you, for being here.”

“Thank you for letting us.”

My darkness wasn’t gone. Not by a long shot. But as I sipped my tea and watched Kenma play his game, I felt Tetsuro carding his fingers through my hair.

“I’m tired.” I said.

“Go to sleep Shouyou.” I heard Kuroo say.

“We will protect you from the darkness,” Kenma says kissing me on top of the head.

**_They protect me from the darkness._ **

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know if you want more of these pairings or a different one all together. I will do my best. But I mean these characters will be in the relationships they are in right now at least for this story.
> 
> Leave a comment and let me know what you think!!!


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